


Five Times Natasha Kissed an Avenger (And One Time It Led to Something More)

by flipflop_diva



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Spoilers, F/M, Five Times, Kissing, Light Angst, Natasha Feels, Natasha-centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-12
Updated: 2015-08-12
Packaged: 2018-04-14 07:10:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,256
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4555422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flipflop_diva/pseuds/flipflop_diva
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They are all her teammates, but sometimes they are something more.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Five Times Natasha Kissed an Avenger (And One Time It Led to Something More)

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [Five Times Challenge](http://card-writing.livejournal.com/24137.html) at Game of Cards on LJ.

She kissed Clint on Christmas Day six months after she joined SHIELD. She hadn’t expected to see him; he was rarely around when they weren’t training or on missions, and it seemed like almost everyone had plans for the day. Natasha didn’t mind. Christmas didn’t mean anything to her. It was just another day like all the others. And it was nice to have the training gym all to herself for hours at a time.

She had just finished a winning battle with the punching bag when he suddenly showed up behind her, standing there and grinning at her with a little gift-wrapped box in his hand.

She frowned at him. “Why are you here?”

“Nice to see you, too,” he said. He held out the package. “I got this for you.”

Her frown deepened. “Why?”

“Because it’s Christmas, and that’s what people do.”

“That’s silly,” she said. She was going to say more, but he grabbed her wrist and set the package on the palm of her hand. 

“Just open it,” he told her.

She scowled at him. It felt _wrong_ somehow to have him be giving her something, when she had nothing to offer him in return. He’d already given her much more than she could ever repay, and she didn’t want to add one more thing on to that steadily growing list. She also worried that this meant they were going to have to be those people who traded presents on things like birthdays. The idea terrified her much more than it should, but she was certainly not going to tell him she had never bought anyone a present before in her life.

Instead she slid her finger under the edges of the gold foil paper and tore it off, revealing a small red box. She scowled again at Clint for good measure before lifting off the lid.

Inside, on a bed of white cotton, lay a thin gold chain with a little arrow pendant on it.

She looked up at Clint, her scowl gone. “You gave me a necklace of you?” she asked.

He smiled. “It’s a reminder,” he said, “that you’re not alone anymore. I’m here for you, whatever you need. If you decide you need someone.”

Natasha glanced back down at the necklace, then lifted a finger to touch it. No one had ever given her a present before. Not really anyway. Not one that was meant for _her_.

“I didn’t get you anything,” she whispered to the box, and she felt Clint reach out and gently rub her shoulder.

“It’s okay, Natasha. I didn’t expect you to.”

She lifted her head then and looked at him, studying his face, his smile, the way his eyes seemed to see more of her than anyone else ever had.

She leaned in then, without thinking, and brushed her lips against his cheek. “Thank you,” she whispered into his ear.

She didn’t tell him that was the first time she’d kissed anyone because she wanted to. She had a feeling he already knew.

•••

She kissed Tony when she was pretending to be someone else. She hadn’t actually meant to, but Fury wanted her to get close to Tony, to make in-roads, and getting close to people had always been her specialty. It was, after all, what she had been trained to do since she was a child.

She was working with him late one night at Stark Industries, or rather, they were supposed to be working, but Tony had pulled out the whiskey and now they were just talking. More specifically, he was talking, and she was listening, smiling, flirting. Her hand on his leg, a touch on his arm.

He didn’t stop her, and she scooted closer, eyes wide, nodding at all the right parts, murmuring agreements with a breathy voice.

He stopped at one point and looked over at her, really looked at her, like he could see beneath her skin.

“What are you doing, Natalie?” he asked her. “Why are you here?”

“Right now?” She blinked in confusion.

“In general.”

She beamed at him. “Just trying to get to know you.”

She leaned in then, moving so her mouth was just millimeters from his, so her breasts were practically against his chest. Then she went for it, pressing her lips firmly against his.

He kissed her back for approximately two seconds before pushing her away.

“Don’t,” he said, and his voice was tight. “I can’t.”

She wasn’t sure if he sounded angry or disappointed or guilty, but she pulled back with another smile and nodded. “Of course,” she said airily. “Let’s pretend it never happened.”

He never mentioned it again, and neither did she — not even when he finally came to know her as Natasha — but that night became the first regret she ever truly had in her life. Even years later, she wondered if things might have been different between her and Tony if they hadn’t shared a secret neither one would ever tell.

•••

She kissed Thor a couple days after the Battle of New York. She found him in one of the extra bedrooms of Stark Tower, where they had all been staying until they could send Loki back to Asgard.

“It’s going to be different without you here,” she told him, leaning against the doorframe.

He looked up and smiled at her. “I am sure we will engage in battle together once more again someday.”

“Yes,” she said. “I’m sure we will.”

“You are a fierce warrior. I am honored to have fought by your side.”

She took a breath. There was something she wanted to say to him, but showing any sort of weakness around people other than Clint … It still wasn’t something she was entirely comfortable with, but Clint had encouraged her to go to him.

“Before you go,” she said. “I just wanted to thank you. You know, for saving me. I owe you.”

Thor frowned at her, his face scrunched in confusion for a moment. Then she saw the glimmer of recognition in his eyes. “From the Hulk, you mean?”

She nodded. “He would have killed me.”

Thor’s face broke into a grin. He held out a hand to her. “Well, it was my pleasure, Lady Natasha. I am sure you will return the favor many times over someday.”

She couldn’t help but smile in return. “I shall try,” she said. She took his hand he was still holding out, intending for a quick handshake, but instead, she stumbled as he pulled her against him, wrapping her in his oversized arms.

“Goodbye, Lady Natasha,” he said, before letting her go.

“Goodbye, Thor,” she said, and before stepping back, she leaned up on her tiptoes and pressed a kiss to his cheek. “Thank you again.”

•••

She kissed Bruce right before she pushed him over the edge of a cliff and turned him into the Hulk.

She had wanted to kiss Bruce for a while, ever since she’d moved in to Avengers Tower. She wasn’t really sure where that urge had come from. Maybe it had come because she had felt different and she was looking for something she didn’t have.

She had blown all her covers and exposed all her secrets when SHIELD fell. She had thought that maybe it would make her feel free. Instead it did the opposite. She suddenly felt like she had nothing left to hold on to and nowhere left to turn.

She had wanted to stay with Steve, but he didn’t need her help. She had wanted to go to Clint, but he was with Laura and the kids. 

Bruce understood her. Or at least he seemed to. She’d visit him in the lab when Tony wasn’t around. He’d watch her in the gym in the middle of the night when they both couldn’t sleep. They talked about their lives, or as much of their lives as they were willing to share.

And the more they talked, the more she wondered. She could never have a family like Clint had, but maybe she could have _something_. Maybe she could have something with Bruce.

And then there it was, right in front of her, Bruce’s words saying everything she had thought she wanted him to say. “We can leave. Run away. Be done.”

And she wanted that. She did. A part of her desperately wanted to know what it was like to just be normal for once, to not have to pay for a lifetime of sins that could never be erased, and here he was, offering her that chance.

But as the words washed over her, she saw her future. And it wasn’t as the dutiful girlfriend running away from the fight. And it wasn’t as the girl who watched the world fall from the sidelines and didn’t do anything to help.

She was not that girl, and she was never going to be.

“I adore you,” she told Bruce, and she meant every word. She placed her hands on his face and pulled him toward her, kissing him just like she had always pictured she would.

Then she let him go, and sent him flying down the side of a cliff.

She had to make a choice, and there was only one real option.

•••

She kissed Steve on an escalator at the mall when they were hiding from Hydra, but she didn’t count that one. She kissed him on the cheek when she handed him the file on the Winter Soldier, but she didn’t count that one either.

Their third kiss, though. That one she definitely counted.

She was in the training gym when he found her, but she wasn’t training and she wasn’t helping anyone else train. Instead, she was sitting on the floor, lost in thought. She’d thought things would be better after Ultron was defeated. They had a new team to train, a new place to live, a whole host of things to keep her distracted, but all she could focus on was the guilt that was eating away at her, at the worry that something horrible was going to happen and it would be all her fault.

She was too lost in her own head to even notice Steve till he sank down beside her. She cursed herself as she jumped in surprise. This wasn’t her. She always knew when someone was in a quarter-mile radius of her.

“What are you doing here?” she said.

“Making sure you’re okay.” Steve wrapped his arms around his legs and looked over at her.

“I’m fine,” she said, instantly bothered by the implication that she wasn’t. She stared straight ahead and didn’t look at him.

“You don’t seem fine.”

“Well, I am.”

“He’s an idiot, you know.”

Natasha whipped her head around to look at Steve. She had not expected that to come out of his mouth. “What?”

“Bruce. He’s an idiot.”

She frowned as she felt the guilt inside her shift. “Don’t say that,” she said immediately.

“It’s true.”

“It’s not true. I hurt him, and he left. He’s gone because of me.”

“He’s gone because he’s an idiot.”

“Steve!”

Steve lifted a hand off his own legs and laid it on her thigh. Almost automatically she moved to get away from him, his hand falling between them to the ground. His eyes, though, didn’t leave her face. He kept talking. 

“He had the most amazing woman in the world want to be with him, and he walked away from that. He’s an idiot.”

Something twisted inside Natasha, something she couldn’t explain. “Steve.” Her voice was barely a whisper.

“It’s true,” he continued. “I don’t know if you know how amazing you are …”

“I’m not.”

“You are. You’re beautiful, but more than that, you’re strong. You’re the strongest, most resilient person I’ve ever met. You’ve gone through more than most people can even imagine, and you didn’t just survive, you came out the other side a _good_ person. Most people, if they went through what you did, they wouldn’t be caring or compassionate or willing to risk their whole life every day just to do the right thing, but you do. Every day, every hour, every minute. You make that choice.”

“Steve …”

His hand lifted from the ground and found her cheek, cupping her face softly. His fingers were warm against her skin, the heat seeming to course all the way through every cell in her body.

“I love you, Natasha Romanoff.”

Natasha felt the blood drain from her body. She stared at Steve, the words he just said rolling around in her head, but not actually making sense.

“What?” she finally managed.

“I love you,” he told her, and his fingers stroked the side of her face. “But I’m not asking you to feel the same way. I’m not asking you for anything. I’m just telling you because I want you to know, and if you ever want to do anything with it” — Steve shrugged — “well, you know where to find me.”

He dropped his fingers from her face and made to stand up. He was halfway to his feet before her body remembered how to move.

She grabbed his wrist. “Wait!”

He turned, his eyes meeting hers. She almost pounced, throwing herself into his arms, her arms around his neck, her lips against his.

“Natasha?” he mumbled when they finally came up for air. She leaned forward and kissed him again.

“Don’t go,” she said, against his lips. 

“No?” she heard him say, and she laughed as she kissed him again.

“Definitely no.”


End file.
